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CHAPTER 10
Be at the center
6 July 1988 pm in Gautam the Buddha Auditorium
BELOVED OSHO,
SUIBI ASKED TANKA, “WHO WAS THE TEACHER OF ALL THE BUDDHAS?”
TANKA SAID TO SUIBI, “YOU’D BETTER NOT TAKE YOURSELF SO SERIOUSLY! USE THE FLOOR CLOTH AND BROOM MORE.”
SUIBI TOOK THREE STEPS TO THE REAR. “A BLUNDER!” CRIED TANKA.
SUIBI THEN STEPPED FORWARD THREE PACES. “ANOTHER BLUNDER!” SAID TANKA.
SUIBI RAISED ONE LEG AND TURNED ROUND ON THE OTHER.
TANKA SAID, “YOU’VE GOT IT; YOU DEFIED THE OTHER TEACHERS OF ALL THE BUDDHAS!” A MONK SAID TO UMMON, “WHAT IS YOUR AGE, MAY I ASK?”
UMMON REPLIED, “SEVEN TIMES NINE – SIXTY-EIGHT.”
THE MONK SAID, “WHAT DO YOU MEAN, ‘SEVEN TIMES NINE – SIXTY-EIGHT’?”
UMMON SAID, “I TOOK OFF FIVE YEARS FOR YOUR SAKE.”
MYOSHO WAS A DISCIPLE OF RAZAN. AT HIS FIRST MEETING WITH RAZAN, HE JUMPED TO HIS FEET AS SOON AS HE HAD MADE HIS BOWS, AND RAZAN ASKED HIM WHERE HE HAD COME FROM. BY WAY OF ANSWER, MYOSHO ASKED, “WHAT IS IT THAT IS HAPPENING JUST AT THIS MOMENT?”
RAZAN SALUTED HIM GRACIOUSLY, AND SAID, “HAVE SOME TEA!”
MYOSHO HESITATED, AND RAZAN SAID, “IT’S A WARM AUTUMN DAY; WHY DON’T YOU GO OUT SOMEWHERE?”
MYOSHO SIGHED, AND THOUGHT THAT HE HAD STARTED OFF FULL OF AMBITION, AND IT HAD ALL COME TO THIS, TO NOTHING.
THE NEXT DAY HE TRIED AGAIN, BUT RAZAN SAID, “THE FEATHERS ARE NOT FULLY GROWN AND THE WINGS ARE NOT STRONG ENOUGH YET; GO AWAY!”
AFTERWARDS, WHEN HE WAS ENLIGHTENED, MYOSHO DID NOT STAY IN ONE SPOT, BUT WENT ROUND THE COUNTRY CONVERTING ALL KINDS OF PEOPLE.
FORTY YEARS LATER, WHEN HE WAS ABOUT TO DIE, MYOSHO ASCENDED THE ROSTRUM AND ADMONISHED AND INSTRUCTED THE MONKS. THAT EVENING HE STRETCHED OUT HIS LEGS AND SAID TO THE MONK-ATTENDANT, “LONG AGO, SHAKA NYORAI STRETCHED OUT BOTH LEGS, AND A HUNDRED TREASURES OF GLORIOUS LIGHT WERE EMITTED. TELL ME, AREN’T I EMITTING SOME?”
THE ATTENDANT REPLIED, “IN ANCIENT TIMES, THE CRANE GROVE; TODAY, YOUR HONOR!”
MYOSHO RUMPLED HIS EYEBROWS AND SAID, “ISN’T SOME FOX MAKING A FOOL OF ME?” HE THEN RECITED A GATHA, SAT IN THE PROPER WAY AND QUIETLY AND SLOWLY PASSED AWAY.
Maneesha, before I discuss the beautiful anecdotes of Zen, I have to warn you that in the neighborhood a few idiots are celebrating a slavery. They call it a marriage ceremony. So don’t take them seriously. Just as we don’t get disturbed by the bamboos, let these bamboos do whatever they want to do. It is a good test for you to remain silent and attentive.
SUIBI ASKED TANKA, “WHO WAS THE TEACHER OF ALL THE BUDDHAS?”
A very common question in the Zen tradition. One naturally wants to know who was the teacher of the buddhas.
The reality is that a buddha never has a teacher or a teaching. He comes in contact with masters, not with teachers. And to be in contact with masters does not mean learning anything. That very exposure to the masters awakens the flame inside him and suddenly he finds the buddha within.
It is a catalytic transformation. Nothing is said, nothing is heard, and in the silent presence of a master people suddenly realize their buddhahood.
TANKA SAID TO SUIBI, “YOU’D BETTER NOT TAKE YOURSELF SO SERIOUSLY! USE THE FLOOR CLOTH AND BROOM MORE.”
SUIBI TOOK THREE STEPS TO THE REAR. “A BLUNDER!”
Going back will not do. Even if you go back to Gautam Buddha, it won’t help. Existence never goes back, not even three steps.
SUIBI THEN STEPPED FORWARD THREE PACES. “ANOTHER BLUNDER!” SAID TANKA.
Because existence never goes ahead of itself. How can it go?
Existence never goes backward or forward. It is always here.
Time is an invention of mind. It is not part of existence.
SUIBI RAISED ONE LEG AND TURNED ROUND ON THE OTHER. Just like the hands of a clock.
TANKA SAID, “YOU HAVE GOT IT; YOU DEFIED THE OTHER TEACHERS OF ALL THE
BUDDHAS!” You got the point:
Be at the center.
Don’t go backward, don’t go forward. Don’t go anywhere, just be.
And in that very being you have surpassed all the teachers of the buddhas. You have become a buddha yourself.
Just a small anecdote, but so beautiful, so great in its depth and meaning that anyone who can see the point can become a buddha that very moment. And here in this assembly, in this silent moment, you are all in the same situation as Suibi: centered, silent, doing nothing. Just being a peace, a love, a consciousness. You have surpassed all the teachers of buddhas in this moment.
The only trouble with you is that you go on forgetting. You go on again and again becoming unconscious. Remain conscious and at the center, and there is no need to worship any master or any buddha. There is no need to learn any scripture. You have all, the whole reality in your hands.
A MONK SAID TO UMMON, “WHAT IS YOUR AGE, MAY I ASK?” UMMON REPLIED, “SEVEN TIMES NINE – SIXTY-EIGHT.”
The monk must have thought it strange, because seven times nine does not make sixty-eight. THE MONK SAID, “WHAT DO YOU MEAN, ‘SEVEN TIMES NINE – SIXTY EIGHT’?” UMMON SAID, “I TOOK OFF FIVE YEARS FOR YOUR SAKE.”
You are so stupid that it will take five years at least to wake you up!
MYOSHO WAS A DISCIPLE OF RAZAN. AT HIS FIRST MEETING WITH RAZAN, HE JUMPED TO HIS FEET AS SOON AS HE HAD MADE HIS BOWS, AND RAZAN ASKED HIM WHERE HE HAD COME FROM. BY WAY OF ANSWER, MYOSHO ASKED, “WHAT IS IT THAT IS HAPPENING JUST AT THIS MOMENT?”
RAZAN SALUTED HIM GRACIOUSLY, AND SAID, “HAVE SOME TEA!”
MYOSHO HESITATED, AND RAZAN SAID, “IT IS A WARM AUTUMN DAY; WHY DON’T YOU GO OUT SOMEWHERE?”
MYOSHO SIGHED, AND THOUGHT THAT HE HAD STARTED OFF FULL OF AMBITION, AND IT HAD ALL COME TO THIS, TO NOTHING.
THE NEXT DAY HE TRIED AGAIN, BUT RAZAN SAID, “THE FEATHERS ARE NOT FULLY GROWN AND THE WINGS ARE NOT STRONG ENOUGH YET; GO AWAY!”
AFTERWARDS, WHEN HE WAS ENLIGHTENED, MYOSHO DID NOT STAY IN ONE SPOT, BUT WENT ROUND THE COUNTRY CONVERTING ALL KINDS OF PEOPLE.
FORTY YEARS LATER, WHEN HE WAS ABOUT TO DIE, MYOSHO ASCENDED THE ROSTRUM AND ADMONISHED AND INSTRUCTED THE MONKS. THAT EVENING HE STRETCHED OUT HIS LEGS AND SAID TO THE MONK-ATTENDANT, “LONG AGO, SHAKA NYORAI STRETCHED OUT BOTH LEGS, AND A HUNDRED TREASURES OF GLORIOUS LIGHT WERE EMITTED. TELL ME, AREN’T I EMITTING SOME?”
THE ATTENDANT REPLIED, “IN ANCIENT TIMES, THE CRANE GROVE; TODAY, YOUR HONOR!”
MYOSHO RUMPLED HIS EYEBROWS AND SAID, “IS NOT SOME FOX MAKING A FOOL OF ME?” HE THEN RECITED A GATHA – a sutra of Gautam Buddha – SAT IN THE PROPER WAY AND QUIETLY AND SLOWLY PASSED AWAY.
It is one of the specialties of Zen tradition that people have lived consciously and people have died consciously. Their death is also as silent, as peaceful, as their life has been; death cannot be otherwise. You are afraid of death because you are afraid of life. If you love life, if you enjoy life, if your life is a dance, you will never be afraid of death because you know that you can dance through death just as well as you can dance in life.
A poem by Reizan:
THE MYRIAD DIFFERENCES RESOLVED BY SITTING, ALL DOORS OPENED.
IN THIS STILL PLACE I FOLLOW MY NATURE, BE WHAT IT MAY.
Just by sitting silently, all doors of existence open. Zen simply means sitting silently, not doing anything. Everything happens spontaneously.
It is ready to happen.
You are preventing it by being busy – busy without business, doing all kinds of stupid things.
This is sheer wastage of a tremendously valuable lifetime. A single moment of silent sitting is an eternity in itself.
You have come home.
FROM THE ONE HUNDRED FLOWERS I WANDER FREELY.
THE SOARING CLIFF – MY HALL OF MEDITATION. WITH THE MOON EMERGED,
MY MIND IS MOTIONLESS. SITTING ON THIS FROSTY SEAT, NO FURTHER DREAM OF FAME. THE FOREST, THE MOUNTAIN, FOLLOW THEIR ANCIENT WAYS,
AND THROUGH THE LONG SPRING DAY
NOT EVEN THE SHADOW OF A BIRD.
Everything is so quiet and silent once your mind is put aside. Question 1
Maneesha has asked:
FOR THOSE OF US WHO CONTINUALLY FORGET THAT WE ARE BUDDHAS, IS IT POSSIBLE TO BE SPONTANEOUS, OR ARE WE ONLY EVER IMPETUOUS?
Maneesha, you cannot forget to be buddhas, you just have not remembered yet – because once remembered, I cannot conceive of how you can forget. You don’t forget that you are a woman, doing thousands of things; you don’t forget that you are a man, doing a thousand things; you don’t forget that you are alive.
And these are very ordinary things. Once you know that you are a buddha, there is no possibility of forgetting it. The real thing is to remember.
You forget because it is only intellectually understood that you are a buddha. Naturally, you forget. Intellectually, you cannot breathe – you will forget. You may get engaged in something and forget to breathe. Intellectually, you cannot have your heart beating because somebody insults you, and you will forget completely that the heart has to remain beating.
Intellectually, everything is superficial. But to understand existentially is to know by your very marrow, by your very heart, by your very beyond. There is no question of forgetting, ever.
I can give you the proof: for thirty-five years I have been trying to forget it and I have failed. I try, day in and day out, to forget. It is so easy to be unenlightened – everybody is enjoying spaghetti. But because of this enlightenment, just the remembrance of spaghetti and I start feeling it is better to commit suicide. Spaghetti? And people are enjoying all kinds of nonsense .…
Unfortunately, I became enlightened.
You are very fortunate. A little more, enjoy.
But one day, remember, if you linger long enough by my side, you are going to become enlightened and never forget it. And you will never forgive me either!
Father Murphy is in the church one Friday night when the door bursts open and Paddy stumbles in, very drunk. The priest watches him stagger around the church until he finds the confessional booth and goes inside.
Father Murphy feels compassion for the poor drunk Paddy, and goes to hear his confession. He enters his side of the booth and waits for Paddy to begin.
Paddy says nothing, just grunts and groans a bit, and then there is silence. The priest becomes impatient and starts knocking on the wall, to encourage Paddy to begin his confession.
“It is no good banging on the wall!” cries Paddy. “There is no toilet paper in here either!” Now, the right joke at the right time:
Sammy and Clarissa have just got married. But shortly after arriving at the honeymoon hotel, the still nervous Sammy becomes worried about the state of his bride’s innocence. Deciding on the direct approach, he quickly undresses. Then pointing at his exposed manhood, he asks Clarissa, “Honey, do you know what this is?”
Without hesitation, she blushes and says, “Why yes, that is a wee-wee.”
Delighted at the idea of instructing his innocent wife in the ways of love, Sammy whispers, “From now on, dearest, this will be called a prick.”
“Ah, come on!” says Clarissa. “That’s a wee-wee. A prick is big and black!”
Bernard the bartender owns a dog called Bessie, who always hangs out in the bar during the evening. But one day, just after Bernard has opened the bar, Bessie wanders over to the entrance and deposits a big shit just inside the door. Bernard does not notice this, and the first customer to come in is Kowalski.
Kowalski’s first step inside lands straight in the pile of shit. He slips ass over tit, slides along the floor and hits his head against the bar.
“Wow!” cries Kowalski, rubbing his head. “Give me a double whiskey.”
The next guy to come in is McCabe, a huge Irishman. He also steps in the shit, slips ass over tit, slides across the floor and hits his head on the bar. “Jesus Christ!” cries McCabe, rubbing his head.
Kowalski is watching all this, and says sympathetically, “I did that.”
So McCabe picks up Kowalski, carries him over to the shit, rubs his nose in it and then throws him out of the door.
It is January, 1989, and Osho has been elected President of the United States.
Swami Deva Coconut has just moved back to the States and he goes into his favorite bar, The Hilarious Horse Pub, and says to the bartender, “Give me a glass of beer. And put on the six o’clock news – I want to see President Reagan’s latest speech to the nation.”
“I am sorry,” says the bartender, “but Reagan is no more in office; Osho is president.”
The next evening Coconut goes into the same bar and says, “Give me a beer, and put on the six o’clock news. I want to see Reagan’s latest speech to the nation.”
“But I told you yesterday,” says the bartender, “Osho is president now.”
But the same thing happens every day that week. Finally, on Saturday, the bartender loses his temper. So when Coconut asks to see Reagan on TV, the poor guy freaks out. “Look here, you
dodo!” he shouts. “Every night you ask to see Reagan on TV, and every night I tell you that Osho is president. Don’t you understand?”
“Of course I do,” says Coconut. “But I just like to hear you say it!”
Now, before the other coconuts come, we have to do our meditation. Of course, many coconuts will freak out. Do your best, at least for today.
Nivedano, give the first beat ... (Drumbeat)
(Gibberish) Nivedano ... (Drumbeat)
Be silent, utterly silent.
No movement. Just be statues and enter in.
(IN THE DISTANCE, THE DRUMS AND BRASS OF THE MARRIAGE PROCESSION CAN BE HEARD. SOON THEY WILL ARRIVE NEXT DOOR FOR THE CEREMONY.)
Deeper and deeper.
Once you are in, nothing can disturb you.
For that particular purpose I have chosen to let the coconuts come with their drums. They cannot disturb a single person here.
Nivedano ... (Drumbeat)
Die, completely die.
Relax so totally ... as if you are no more the body, no more the mind, but just a pure flame of light and joy.
In the neighborhood, slavery is happening. Here, freedom is the only teaching, the only way.
And you can be free only when you are in your innermost being.
At this point, you defeat all the buddhas because you yourself become the latest buddha. Nivedano ...
(Drumbeat)
Bring all the buddhas back – resurrected, rejuvenated, remembering who they are. Sit in the buddha posture silently and listen to the coconuts!
It is a great moment to be a watcher of a coconut marriage. Just be, and nothing in the whole world can stir you.
Okay, Maneesha?
Yes, Osho.
Can we celebrate so many buddhas in a world full of coconuts? Yes!
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