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‌CHAPTER 2

2 May 1977 pm in Chuang Tzu Auditorium

Deva means divine and tapan means heat energy – divine heat energy. And that’s exactly what life is. We are not matter. Matter simply does not exist, matter is a myth. That which exists is energy. Energy means that things are not things, they are processes. The whole existence is a dynamic force – it is not static: it is moving, it is growing, it is evolving. Matter is a static concept – it is just there, nothing is happening to it. But there is not a single thing in existence which is just there. Tremendous things are happening to each thing, and everything is evolving and moving – there is great growth.

So the first thing: existence is not material – it is dynamic, it is a process, it is energy... and we are part of it!

And the second thing to remember: energy is not just energy; it is heat energy, it has a warmth in it, it is love energy. So you grow only when you are hot; when you become cold you stop growing. Death is cold, life is hot. Love is hot, so is hate – indifference is cold. So the worst situation that man can be in is indifference. In comparison to indifference even hate is good – at least it is hot, something is boiling there. Hate can be turned into love because both are hot energies. Indifference cannot be turned into love; it is simply death – and down the centuries man has been taught to remain cold.

To remain cold has become the very way of people, their very style. That’s why you see so many mummies, dead corpses, walking around. Nothing is alive – just machines, robots, doing everything that is required but not living... not living with joy, not alive dynamos, not creative.

So my whole teaching is based on being hot... remember that.

‘Tapan’ is a beautiful word – it means heat energy. Energy always flows with heat. The river flows when it is warm; when it is cold it freezes, stops flowing; then there is ice. And when you freeze, when you are cold, you become matter; when you melt you become energy.

So when a person is deep in love he is energy, and when he is simply cold and calculating.There

are people who do nothing else but bookkeeping, cold calculations – ‘the bookkeepers’; they are always calculating and always being cunning and cold. Mathematics seems to be their only life. When a person is just calculating, he is matter. When he is loving and is ready to take the risk of love and is ready to melt and flow, he is energy.

So the first thing: the energy should not be allowed to become cold, otherwise it freezes. And the second thing to remember is that the energy is not just energy – it is divine too, it is god’s existence. Existence is full of god – too full of god, overcrowded with god. Move with energy, let there be warmth, liquidity, flow, and soon you will recognise that when you are really at the optimum of your flow, you have the experience of the divine. At the optimum of your flow you touch the unknown, the intangible. That which cannot be touched you touch, and you know that which cannot be known. You experience it, you have a taste of it.…

[A sannyasin who is leaving said she had a tension in her throat since childhood, and she has difficulty crying.]

Whenever you can manage, come back, because a few groups are a must. It is not much of a problem – it is just a question of a good scream coming from your navel, just one scream, a deep scream, with your not holding it in any way but just becoming the scream. It will come from the navel and it will shake your whole body. It will almost be a surprise to you how much you have been holding it. Because you have to hold it continuously, that’s why the tension. Once it is released the tension will go.

So I will suggest that while you are there you do one thing every night: before you go to sleep, just sit in this way [she is sitting upright with her legs folded under her], hold this box in your hands this way and just sit silently. Start feeling that you are a small child, a very small child. Go back as far as you can – become just a small child, very small, helpless, in the crib. If you feel like lying down, lie down, but feel like a small child, nobody to look after you. It is a dark night and you are very much afraid.you cannot find where the mother is, where the father is – you seem to be abandoned by

them. What can a small child do when he or she is abandoned ? He will kick, he will scream, he will cry loudly so somebody can hear – but there is nobody to hear.

Create that mental climate – and then you will start feeling a cry coming to you. Go into it, don’t hold it; there is no point in holding it. Just go into it, sob deeply, cry, scream. Whatsoever comes, allow it, and feel as if you are a small child.

If you continue it every night for five, seven minutes, within three months, some day it will happen. So you are not to be worried that it has not happened and one month has gone – you continue. Within three months, some day you will simply fall into that mood and it will happen, and when it happens, all these tensions will disappear.

Then come in winter and do a few groups – particularly primal therapy will be needed, mm? And these things will go – nothing to be worried about.

[A sannyasin who is a photographer said she was feeling low energy and disinterested in photography.]

... This comes again and again in everybody’s life: whatsoever you are doing you get tired of, you get fed up, you get bored with it. It is very easy to be interested in a new thing – it needs great guts to remain interested in an old thing. That’s what makes a person a genius. Otherwise everybody will become a genius. The only difference between a genius and an ordinary person is that the genius has the guts to stick at something even when he is feeling bored, fed up.

These are plateaus that come. Mm? you work with great joy because something is new – there is a great exploration, new territory and you are enchanted... it is like a romance, a honeymoon. But by and by you become acquainted with the territory; you have looked into all the corners of it and there seems to be nothing new. Now you know all about it so the sensation is no more there, the thrill is no more there.

Now, it is at this point that if you can stick at it and make efforts to find something new in it, you will break through one plane, and on another plane the exploration starts again. If you simply listen to this boredom and you drop out, then those seven years will have gone down the drain.

That’s how many people lose their life energy: they don’t stick at things. It really needs courage to remain with the old, because when the plateau comes and everything seems to be just a repetition, doing the same thing again and again and again, one feels to change – change the wife, change the husband, change the job, change the friend, change the town, go somewhere else, do something new. But with the new again after seven years the same will happen! You can change ten times in your life and after each seven years the same will happen, so the whole life will be a wastage. If you go on digging on the same spot for seventy years you will reach to some depth – and it can be reached from anywhere.

Now photography is such a creative thing and it is going to be more and more creative in the future because more sophisticated instruments will be available – they are available. You can do a thousand and one things with photography now; just a few years ago they were just impossible to do. One has to be creative, inventive... one has to look for new ways, new visions, new dreams. And sometimes this is natural, this is part of nature: one feels stuck.

Those who drop out are the rolling stones: they don’t gather any moss. And it has nothing to do with the work itself – it is just the tendency of the mind. Photography or painting or music, or dancing – anything – will come to the same point, and once you have made a pattern it will be repeated. This is really a sheer wastage of energies.

Go on working in it. If you are feeling stuck, that simply means that you have to explore new ways, new directions, new dimensions in it; and they are always there! Life is so mysterious that it is never finished. A man can go on working with a small thing and can devote his whole life to it and still there will be much to be explored after he has died.

This is the whole art of being a genius. The genius is just a little more stubborn than ordinary people, that’s all. He does not listen to the mind – he goes on hammering: he digs a hole.

A sufi master – Jalaluddin Rumi – once took his disciples to a field. There were eight holes in the field and no hole had any water; the whole field was wasted. The disciples asked, ‘Master, why have you brought us here?’

He said, ‘To teach you something. This farmer wants to dig a well. He digs eight feet, ten feet, then he gets fed up with it and he thinks that this place is not right; he is bored so he starts digging at some other place. He has done this work the whole year round – he has destroyed the whole field and not a single hole has become a well. Now if he had dug at the same spot that well would have been one hundred feet deep.’ Jalaluddin said to his disciples, ‘Remember this – the same applies to the inner world too.’

Just gather yourself together and don’t try to find excuses – simply start working with your total energy. From tomorrow morning start without thinking about it! Just go ahead, and within a few days it will be broken... and when it is broken, you will feel so thrilled. Whenever any plateau is broken, life takes on such a beauty and the work becomes such a joy. Then it is a second honeymoon and on a deeper level. And I am saying this to you to be remembered as a golden rule – it is so in every way, in every direction of life. If you love a man, one day you will feel finished; that is the right moment to go on loving, to gather your energies and to explore the man again. If you can break that plateau you will see a new man arising before you... fresher than ever, younger than ever, more beautiful than ever. In fact you had never known such beauty and such depth. You have broken one more screen – the man is more available to you... again one day you will feel stuck!

And remember: those who lose heart and escape, are great losers. Be a little more stubborn, stick to it. For three months do all that you can do with effort and then you tell me, mm?

[A sannyasin who had his long hair and beard shaved off, says: I had many reasons on the surface to do this, but afterwards I felt it was like peeling a layer from me. I feel also that there was a very strong reason underneath... ]

Mm mm. There are always deeper reasons and the superficial ones are just excuses – they are in fact the tricks to hide the deeper reasons, they are rationalisations. Whatsoever you do, even a small act, is a message somewhere from the unconscious. Now, it is one of the very ancient things; it has not only happened to you. For thousands of years there have been two types of sannyasins in India: one with beard, long hair; one without beard, without hair. Those who have beards and long hair have a certain deep reason for it – they may not be aware of it. Long hair has always been antisocial. The beard and long hair particularly, have always belonged to the bohemians: artists, painters, asocial elements, rebellious people, crazy, eccentric. This is one extreme. The other extreme is the shaven-headed monk. Between the two is the straight person, the common man, who is not eccentric this way or that. On one hand are the rebellious people – rebellious in the sense that their religion will be non-traditional. The shaven-headed people are those who have a certain affinity with the tradition. They will be religious but they will not be anti-traditional. They may be as asocial as the long-haired ones, but they will not be anti-tradition. They will feel a continuity with the past, they will have a certain heritage, they will have a feeling of belonging.

My feeling is that up to now you have lived in one way – that was rebellious, a little eccentric. Sannyas has changed something in you, your meditations have changed something in you. You don’t feel so rebellious, you are feeling more in tune with the eternal tradition of religion. You don’t want to be individual any more – you want to efface yourself.

Long hair gives individuality. If you shave one thousand people and have them standing naked, you will not be able to find out who is who – the shaven heads look almost the same. Much individuality comes about through the hair. That’s why women are so interested in hair: it gives them individuality, personality. With shaven-headed women you will not see much difference between the homely and the beautiful. In fact, in the african tribes, to find out the real beauty they shave the women, because then only rarely does one woman stand out as beautiful; the other ninety-nine percent will simply disappear in the mob. Something has changed in you – the rebelliousness. You have dropped something. You want to be at ease with the past, not in conflict; you want to be restful and relaxed, you want to belong. And you don’t want any signature of your own – you want to efface yourself.

This is symbolic of effacement, of losing your face, that’s why you felt as if a layer has dropped... it has dropped! Long hair and a beard gives you personality, it gives you persona, it is a mask. Looking in the mirror you will see that you are a totally different person, you cannot recognise that you are the same... a discontinuity, something has disappeared, something has fallen away.

Good! Just try to understand this message. You are not the type who can be rebellious; that will be a strain on you. You are not the type who wants to stand alone and separate. You are the type who would like to simply be lost, whom nobody knows about. In that abandonment you will feel rest and relaxation. I am not saying that this is so for everybody – there are different types of people. And religion happens in two ways: either it is traditional or it is rebellious. The rebellious person will like a beard, long hair. The rebellious person does not want to belong – he wants to be separate, he wants to be an island. Both are good; whatsoever suits you is the question. It seems this will suit you more, but there is no need to have a fixed attitude, because sometimes this may change – you may again like to have a long beard. This moment it suits you; maybe when its work is done it will disappear again.

There are people who continuously do this: they will cut their beard and then grow the beard, will cut the beard... and it goes on. Just listen to the heart and go with it; don’t impose anything and then you will be more in tune with your unconscious. And not only about the hair – about other things too, listen to the conscious. If it gives some hint, follow it. It is wiser than your conscious because it is older.

The conscious is just a child – the unconscious is very ancient... it has all the wisdom of the world. Whenever you impose something, it is from the conscious onto the unconscious. When you don’t impose anything, the unconscious rules and the conscious follows – and that is the right way. Good, it is perfectly good, mm?

[A sannyasin had been given a meditation in order to resolve a decision to end or continue a relationship. Nothing was resolved and now they are separating.]

Then separate. There is no need to resolve anything forcibly: if it resolves, good; if it doesn’t resolve, separate. And don’t feel guilty – it is absolutely right, it is your life.

[I feel right about it – my question involves my trust with you.When it wasn’t resolved I began

asking myself if you know me or if you’re just experimenting with me or?]

I know you, mm? I know you.You did not want it to be resolved. It could have been resolved – but

whatsoever I say about the future is always a possibility, it is not a certainty. I am not prophesising,

I am not saying that it will resolve – even to say that may create problems – I’m simply saying that it can resolve... but you did not want it to. If it had been resolved you would not have felt so right as you do.

And the future is always open-ended. We can only be certain about the past, never about the future. I can see what is possible, but there are a thousand possibilities and only one will become actual. I have given you the method to try. If you were really willing it would have happened – but nothing can happen against you.

Watch your own mind: deep down, very deep down, you did not want it to succeed. On the surface you were trying everything; because I had told you, you were trying. You trusted me so you were trying, but deep down there was an element which didn’t want it to happen – maybe it was very unconscious, maybe you are still not alert about it – so it didn’t happen.

Nothing can happen against you, and I am not here to force anything to happen against you. I can simply show you the way and say to try it. That’s why you are feeling very right. You are happy that it didn’t happen.

And now another thing: side by side, you had a good opportunity to doubt me too. That too is always there: hidden behind trust there is always doubt. And I am not saying that there is anything wrong in it; it is natural. How can you trust me absolutely? You have not done anything absolutely. How can you trust me absolutely? It is impossible, inhuman... I don’t expect it either.

Your trust is a layer; behind the layer is deeper doubt. You will find every opportunity to doubt, and whenever you can find an opportunity you will never miss it. In fact, you will miss many opportunities to trust but you will never miss any opportunity to doubt – watch it!

If I give you one hundred opportunities and ninety-nine are to help trust, you can miss them, but the one that creates doubt you will not miss. It is just as if I do ninety-nine loving acts to you and you forget them and one day I am angry at you – only one act of anger – and you cannot forget, you cannot forgive. You forget all those ninety-nine acts of love. One act of anger becomes tremendously important because deep down the mind needs, is waiting to feed on, any negativity possible.

So you enjoyed two things: first you enjoyed the woman being dropped and your being finished – no more botheration. Secondly, you enjoyed another trip also – that now you need not trust so much; that too will make you feel good.

Just watch how the mind functions, and always remember – not only about this, in the future also – whatsoever I say is just a possibility: it depends on you whether to make it actual or not.

And I give you total freedom – that’s my way of working. I could have managed it, I could have forced something upon you, but that would not be my work, that is not my work, and that would not have made you happy either.

If you really want to get rid of the partner then why should you be forced together? I am not in favour of any marriage or monogamy or anything. Whatsoever is good, is good; whatsoever makes you feel good is good.

So remember it in the future also. My trust is not at stake. Your trust towards me should be unconditional – only then is it trust. If it has condition then it cannot last very long... it is already dead. But it is good that you tried.…

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