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CHAPTER 9
9 March 1977 pm in Chuang Tzu Auditorium
[Osho tells a sannyasin couple that through sexual freedom within the community here, people would naturally find the sexual need dropping and a spontaneous celibacy arising. The swami says: I feel more and more that in me the suffering that’s happening is getting smaller and smaller.]
It is... it is! The more aware you become, the more childish and stupid it looks. In the name of sex man has suffered so much... unimaginably, unaccountably. Ninety-nine percent of the suffering of humanity can be dissolved if people can become a little more understanding about sex. Ninety-nine percent of misery is because of sex – and because of misunderstanding, not because of sex! Not because of sex itself – because sex is simply innocent; it has nothing to do with your misery.
It can make you very very happy, but man has created so many taboos around it. Those taboos don’t allow the energy to move in a flow; they obstruct it in a thousand and one ways and only allow it into a certain channel. Sometimes it flows in that channel, good; sometimes it doesn’t flow because you cannot force it. Then problems arise and suffering and misery, and then character and morality and heaven and hell and everything comes behind it . . . and it is a very innocent phenomenon.
With a more mature humanity sex will not be a problem at all; it will be just like breathing. Nobody is worried about breathing, nobody creates any problem about it. It should be just like that: a simple communication. And in fact it has no involvement.
Involvements are man-made but because of the involvements and certain other things – the ego, the prestige, the power trip, the possessiveness, the domination.And somehow when your woman
starts moving with somebody you feel as if you are being rejected.
That is absolutely wrong; you are not rejected. Your woman is simply saying that she is still interested in man. You are just one representative of man. She is still interested in man, and other men are as much man as you are.
In fact the energies are interested in energies. [the girlfriend] is not interested in [the boyfriend] himself but in the masculine energy that is expressing itself through [the boyfriend]; deep interest is in that masculine energy. You are not interested in [the girlfriend herself]; [the girlfriend] is just a window to the feminine energy.
Now, we become too much attached to the window and we forget completely, we lose all track of the energy that was flowing through the window; the window becomes all. Then we feel that if we have to see any beautiful sky we have to see through this window. Sometimes the sun is not at that window; it is very cloudy there. The sun is at another window, you can open another window, but you cannot because you have become too much attached to the window, the frame. It is the same sky! From this window and from another window, the sky is one. It is the same sun from this window or from another window; only frames differ.
Now this is foolish! If the sun is flowing at the window that you have become accustomed to calling yours, good!
But if the sun is not flowing there, any other window is as good.
This freedom is one of the greatest of freedoms . . . and this freedom has to be allowed by and by. The more aware you become, the more this freedom has to be allowed.
And one more thing, very paradoxical: if a person becomes less and less interested in the windows and more and more in the real phenomenon of the feminine and the masculine energy, the yin and yang, then the second happens. The first revolution is that one becomes free of the windows and the second revolution is that one becomes free of the sky itself. Why?
Because once you see that the sky is the same on all the windows and once you have seen the sky from different windows and you have tasted different windows and you always come to the same experience, then the experience becomes repetitive and you start seeing that you can go on repeating ad infinitum and nothing is going to be attained out of it. Then all interest in sex is lost. This is the paradox: if sex is free interest in sex is lost completely, utterly.
If one day a person wants to really become a bramacharya, really celibate, authentically celibate without any imposition, naturally celibate, then the only way is to live through all the windows possible, to see the sky from different windows.
What is happening right now is that you are too attached to one window so you remain interested in other windows. What is happening right now is this: you cannot go to the other windows but you go on looking out of the comer of the eye and you have fantasies.
Now, fantasies never free any person: fantasies are the basic root of all bondage. You cling to the window and you go on looking at other windows out of the corner of your eye and you always have the suspicion that others are enjoying more . . . naturally, because you are fed up with this window and this sky.
You want to go but you cannot. The society, the culture, the civilisation, the whole heritage, the past, the morality, the priest, the politician – all are against it. And you yourself are made by all these conditionings so you are also against it.
Now you are in a difficulty: you cannot leave this window, it is against your respectability. It is your super-ego which says no, which says that you have to sacrifice, it is a commitment – and your nature, your sexuality goes on looking for new pastures, new thrills, new kicks. It creates a split in you, a division . . . repression, guilt and all that. This is the source of all neuroses. This is not the way to be whole and healthy and fulfilled.
Drop repressive inhibitions, drop guilt-creating taboos. Accept nature whole-heartedly and go with it, flow with it. Flowing in a let-go, one is transformed utterly. Through sex comes freedom from sex: experience liberates.
One day suddenly one comes to know that there is no fantasy left, all has simply disappeared, and the whole game takes a new turn. Then you become interested. There must be something which needs to be searched for in you.
The woman cannot be outside – the outside is a projection; the man cannot be outside – the outside is a projection. The woman and the man must be somewhere inside your being. That’s why you are never finished: the interest remains, you get bored, again and again bored, again and again the idea arises back. It seems to be very repetitive . . . ad nauseum.
Then you become aware that it has something to do with your inner being – you have to meet in your inner core: the yin and yang have to meet there, the orgasm has to happen there.
The society is very sexual because sex has been repressed. If sex is made free society will become asexual. Now this is the trip of the sexualists – that they have made a very repressed society. They are serving sex: all your mahatmas and all your puritans and all your moralists are in the service of sex. They don’t allow one to really get the insight into it; the fantasy continues. They have put so many inhibitions and taboos on sex that you cannot look directly at what it is. So be direct, be absolutely clear about it.
Good – relate to each other whatsoever happens in your mind. And always think that love is something very very different from sex and don’t get mixed up about it.
In fact your love may grow higher if you give each other a sexual freedom because then you are not at each others’ throats. And how can she not be able to feel grateful to you, and how will you not be able to feel grateful to her that you gave each other so much freedom? Because you give freedom love will become enhanced, and sooner or later you may be finished. It is not much; one can be finished very soon.
When you are finished with the constant desire for every woman, for every man, then you will fall back upon each other and that will be a totally new merger, a new meeting. Then she can represent your inner woman, you can represent her inner man, and you can help each other.
Then you will not be looking out of the corner of your eye anywhere; you will be able to look into each other’s eyes immediately, directly. Then there is nowhere else to go.
Once you have known many women you know that all women are the same. The difference is maybe of the bonnet – like that, nothing much; the basic energy is the same. And so are all men alike; the differences are superficial.
The superficial has become very important and we are so attached to the superficial that we don’t look into the deeper.
Here, to be with me, you have to learn as much freedom as possible and as much love as possible.
My whole effort here is to bring you to a point where you can transcend sex, because unless you transcend sex you can never fly in the heavens; you are too much rooted in the earth, too earthly. But the only way to transcend sex is through deep freedom in sex. And there is no need to hide because if you are not jealous about each other, or if you start feeling that jealousy is stupid; even if you feel jealous, you feel the stupidity rather than a righteous anger, then you can become more and more close and your hearts will be more and more open.
A friendship will arise which is more valuable than the so-called sexual relationship. It will be more refined, more delicate.
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