27

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‌CHAPTER 27

27 October 1978 pm in Chuang Tzu Auditorium

Deva means divine and halim should mean ‘no person’, not mild person. Even if you are a mild person, you remain arrogant in your mildness. It is hidden – it is not so overt, not so obvious, it has gone underground – but the mild person still carries the ego; maybe now the ego is that of mildness, humbleness. The ego can even pretend egolessness, and that is the most subtle trap.

So from now onwards, whatsoever it means linguistically is irrelevant; it should mean ‘no-person’. Then real humbleness arises. That humbleness has no place for the ego, no place for the person at all, no place for any self, because the self is a cell in whatever form it is found. It may be in the garb of a mild person, humble, religious, prayerful, but it is there. And sometimes it is more poisonous when it is mild because nobody can see it; it becomes invisible. And the enemy is more dangerous when it is invisible. And not only will others not be able to see it – you yourself will not be able to see it; it can become so invisible.

And mildness is appreciated by all. Nobody condemns it, except people like me. Unless you come across a person like me, nobody condemns it; everybody appreciates it. And when everybody appreciates something, you continuously go on strengthening it; you become more and more and more entangled in it. It is very good for the society for people to be mild and humble, because then they can be easily forced to be obedient. They can easily be reduced to slavery.

The society has always appreciated anything that keeps you non-rebellious, that makes you just a part of the crowd, that which keeps you a non-individual. So all these social values are really great strategies. Everybody will say ‘Look, how humble, how mild a person he is. People should be like him.’ This is a strategy, very tricky, and the technique is: if you appreciate mildness, people start becoming mild, and how can a mild person rebel? How can a mild person say no? How can a mild person be disobedient? And this society and all societies up to now have been in great need of slaves. They need people who are easily ready to bow down to any authoritative figure, to any

authority – to the state, to the church. That mildness is not religious... it is a political trick played upon people. Then what is real mildness?

Real mildness is not against the ego; it is simply the absence of the ego. It is not the opposite. The unreal mildness is opposite to the ego. It is the ego standing on its own head, just vice versa, that’s all. Nothing has changed. The person who was bragging ‘I am this and that’ now is bragging ‘I am nobody... just the dust underneath your feet.’ The whole thing has gone upside-down but nothing has changed.

Real mildness means absence of the ego, absence of the self. Real mildness comes only as fanna – when you disappear, when you dissolve into the beloved, when you are no more.

So let Halim mean that. I don’t care a bit about what linguists say. My whole concern is about existential truths, not linguistics. So from this moment start thinking in terms of Halim meaning no-self... not just mild self but no-self, not just a mild person but no-person. Efface the person completely. I am not saying to become obedient; I am saying no disobedience, no obedience. Forget about that duality – just be, with no reference to obedience or disobedience. And then a great intelligence arises, and that intelligence will tell you what to obey and what not to obey.

There will be no puzzle and no confusion ever. That intelligence will simply show you ‘This is the door and this is the wall, so don’t go through the wall; otherwise you will be unnecessarily hurting yourself.’ In real intelligence there are no alternatives; that is the definition of real intelligence. Real intelligence knows no alternatives; it is never either/or. There is no question! There is the door and that is the wall – there is no choice.

The intelligent person lives choicelessly; whatsoever is right is so right that it has to be done! It is not a question of obeying anybody or disobeying anybody. That is all irrelevant. It is so right in itself that it has to be done. Whether it has been ordered by an authoritative figure or told by a small child it doesn’t matter.

If it is right, it is right. It may have been said by your own servant – if it is right, it is right. And it may have been told by the king of the country, but if it is not right, it is not right. And the intelligent person simply has no way to choose. He moves towards the right, just as water moves towards depth; it is natural. But intelligence is possible only when one disappears.

To be a no-self is the beginning of intelligence.

Deva means divine, toshi means contentment – divine contentment. Life is utterly beautiful... more than we can ever expect or dream. Life is a constant benediction... more than we can ever imagine or ask. But we go on missing this beauty and this benediction because we are continuously hankering for something or other. In that hankering the present moment goes on slipping out of our hands. We remain occupied with the future. That is the meaning of ‘discontent’: remaining occupied with the future, thinking of tomorrow, planning for tomorrow, asking for more and more and never living in this moment, never getting intoxicated with the now and the here of things.

The discontent carries you continuously away from the moment. It takes you away from your home, hence you feel tired, weary, bored... because there is no rest in discontent. Rest is possible only

when you are in the moment of contentment. Then there is relaxation, let-go, and a great well-being arises. And it does not come from anywhere else – it arises out of you; it is the fragrance of your own nature. Only one thing is needed to be fulfilled and that is to be in the moment. Contentment means living moment to moment as if this moment is the only moment there is, as if there is going to be no other moment, so why not live it in its totality. Who knows? – the next may never come. Why not pour one’s whole dance into life? Why not taste life as it is in gratefulness? Why not sing the song that one has always wanted to sing but is postponing? Why not love? Why not celebrate?

Sannyas is the initiation into this celebration. My whole message consists of living in the moment, dying continuously to the past and never projecting the future. When you are utterly herenow, god is. That is the meaning of your name.

[A sannyasin asks about his unhappiness: No, it’s driving me crazy! It just goes on and on and on.]

Millions of people are unhappy but not aware that they are unhappy. They have taken it for granted that this is what life is. In fact, ninety-nine percent of the people are in that situation, and the only way they know to live is the way of misery.

If one becomes aware that one is miserable it is a good beginning. Of course, it drives one crazy in the beginning because one was living so silently, accepting everything as it was, blissfully unaware and ignorant. Then suddenly, this explosion when one becomes aware ‘Whatsoever I am doing is wrong, and whatsoever I have been is wrong. My whole pattern, my whole structure and gestalt of life is misery-creating.’ It drives one crazy. That’s natural.

But if you remain in this state without accepting misery again and slowly slowly trying to drop the ways that create misery, the change is not very far away. But don’t be in a hurry; these things cannot be done in a hurry. This misery you have earned in many lives. k is not a seasonal flower – it has great roots... not only in this life but in past lives too. This has been your way and it has gone deep into your very being. But the great day of blessing has come – that now you are becoming aware of it; this is the beginning of the end.

If one really becomes aware of what one has been doing to oneself, things start changing, because one cannot do the same thing when one is aware. Awareness itself is the transformation, the transforming process; nothing else is needed.

Suddenly you will become aware that you are going to do something that will create misery. In the middle of it you will become aware, red-handed you will catch yourself and you will withdraw, because if you see that this is going to create misery, what is the point?... unless you choose to be miserable, but then that is your choice. Then there is no need to complain about it; then there is no need to ask for sympathy. If you choose to be miserable, it is your life; you are totally free to do it. Now it will be a question of choice more and more. Up to now it was destiny, up to now you were not aware; it was almost a fixed thing.

You were simply repeating a pattern unconsciously.

Now the process of de-automatisation has started: now you will become aware. You are going to say something to somebody and suddenly in the middle of talking you will become aware that

whatsoever you are doing will offend the other and he will insult you and it will create misery for you and agony and anger, so what is the point? In the middle of the sentence suddenly you will withdraw. You will say ‘Sorry – I was falling into an old pattern. Forget all about what I was saying.’

Slowly slowly from everywhere you will start withdrawing yourself; and that’s how one changes. It is good! It drives you crazy in the beginning but it drives you crazy only because the old pattern has to be dropped and you don’t know what is going to happen next if the old pattern is dropped.

If you are really interested in becoming blissful then no new pattern is going to replace the old. The old pattern will be dropped, and you will not have any pattern whatsoever; you will have to live moment to moment consciously without any pattern. That is the way of bliss. All patterns lead to misery – only a no-patterned life is blissful. All structures lead to boredom because when you repeat them again and again they create boredom. Only when life is lived moment to moment in a fresh way, in a responsive way, not out of the past pattern, not with ready-made conclusions, is there bliss, is there joy.

But whosoever chooses to drop misery and move into the world of bliss will have to pass a few moments of utter craziness. It is those moments when a master is needed – to give you support, to keep you together, to hold your hand. And I am here; you need not worry! Just start becoming more and more alert, and wherever you find it, mercilessly stop immediately. Don’t hope that this time it will be different; it is never different. If you follow an old pattern the old conclusion is bound to come.

For a few days you will have to be on guard, and then slowly slowly the old pattern goes farther away from you; you become disconnected, and that disconnection is all that is needed. Then you are free, without any structure, and to be free is the only joy – not to follow any character, any structure, any pattern, not to be a gramophone record, not to go on playing old tapes again and again. Then boredom disappears, misery disappears, and then one is young, fresh, alive.…

The first thing that you do is either Postural Integration or Rolfing – one of the two, whichever is available, mm? some work on the body, because when a person has lived too long in misery the body starts creating a certain armour around itself. Even the musculature becomes a part of your misery pattern. Those muscles have to be dissolved. So Rolfing or P.I. – do one of them. Then do Tantra, the first group, Tao the second group, and Encounter the third group.

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