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‌CHAPTER 5

5 November 1978 pm in Chuang Tzu Auditorium

Deva means divine, anadi means beginningless – the beginningless god. God has no beginning, no end. It is eternal.

Prem means love, adi means beginning – beginning of love, and that is the beginning of sannyas. If you can help them to become more and more loving, that’s all, they will become perfect sannyasins. Everything else is a ritual; only love is real. Initiation into reality means initiation into love.

[A sannyasin couple with two children ask for help with their relationship because the man loves the woman but she feels so repressed she cannot give much love to her husband.]

That’s the situation that almost all human beings are in. We are taught a very repressive attitude, we are taught to repress the negative. It looks very logical not to be angry, not to be hateful, not to be jealous, not to be greedy, it looks perfectly good that you should not be these things, but when you repress the negative automatically the positive is repressed.

You can be loving only if you also allow your hate to surface. They are together: if you repress hate, love will be repressed; you cannot separate them. That is one of the most significant things to understand, and man has suffered much because of that misunderstanding. We have been told that love and hate can be separated. They cannot be separated, they are two sides of the same coin.

Hidden behind love is hate, hidden behind compassion is anger, and so on, so forth. The polar opposite always exists with it so when you repress one, both are repressed; if you express one, both will have to be expressed. And down the ages the society has decided to repress the negative, hence the positive has disappeared. When the positive disappears life is meaningless; then there is no significance.

It is for the first time in human history that man is becoming aware of this phenomenon: that the hate part also needs to be accepted, that it has also to be welcomed, that we are not to reject it in any way. We have to understand that once the negative is allowed the positive will surface.

(To the man) She has repressed the negative. And women are more repressive about the negative because they have been told to have a better demeanour, a better, more graceful personality. Men are allowed a little bit: if they are angry and they shout, it’s okay; but the woman should not shout, she should not be angry, she should not use swear-words, mm? – that is not womanly. At the most she can cry. She can be sad but not angry; man is not allowed to cry but he is allowed to be angry.

So it happens almost always that the women become less loving. In fact they have the capacity to love more than men, but because of that capacity they have all the more capacity to hate too. Once a woman loves you her love is too much; if she hates you, her hate is too much. You can neither bear her love nor her hate. Man is very lukewarm, his love is lukewarm, his hate is lukewarm, because he has many more dimensions, he has many more things in life.

Love is the whole life of the woman. Certainly because of that it has too much intensity. Humanity must have become aware of the phenomenon that if woman is allowed to hate, there will be danger, it will be fire: Repress it. Hate has been repressed; now love is being repressed. Both have disappeared into the unconscious, so at the most woman can show gestures of love.

But this will happen, there is nothing to be worried about. Go through a few more groups. I will give you deeper groups, then I will give you one group for you both to do together, but only later on; first you should do a few groups separately.

After two, three groups I will give you one or two groups to do together; by that time you will both be ready.

But this problem will be settled – there is nothing to be worried about!

[A sannyasin who is leaving says: Oh, I’ve grown to love you!... I feel like a new flower in the garden... and the wind is going to blow strong.]

There is nothing to be worried about; there is nothing to be worried about, because the wind belongs to the same energy as the flower. Blow with the wind ! The problem arises only if the flower starts fighting with the wind; then it will be difficult. But bow down with the wind, don’t resist it! Learn how to bow down. Don’t be stiff, be relaxed.

Watch grass leaves moving in the wind: so delicate; yet even the strongest wind cannot destroy them. It can destroy big trees, many big trees will be destroyed when the strong wind comes, bu the grass, the small bushes, will not be destroyed at all. In fact, they will be cleaned: all the dust will be gone with the wind; they will be refreshed, rejuvenated. And once the wind is gone they will be back to their same posture. No harm is going to happen to them; they know the secret of life!

The big tree represents the ego: it resists the wind. It is not the wind that destroys the tree; it is the resistance of the tree, it is the fight of the tree. It does not know how to go with the wind, it does not allow a let-go, it does not know the grammar of surrender. It starts fighting. It is proud, it wants to

show to the wind ‘You cannot destroy me’; then the trouble arises, then there is clash. and once the big tree falls down it will not be able to get up again because the falling has been non-voluntary, the falling has been an accident.

When the small bush falls it is voluntarily going with the wind. It knows how to fall, that’s why it knows how to get back up. In that very surrender it has learned a secret, how to fall; and that is the same secret of how to get up, it is not a different thing. But the big tree missed the point of learning how to fall; hence it cannot get up, it can’t get back up again.

This is the whole art of tao, the whole philosophy of tao, and this is my approach towards life: don’t push the river, don’t even swim. and don’t try to go upstream, go with the river, let the river take total possession of you, and then suddenly the river is your energy and your energy is the river’s energy and both are one, and there is no clash, no conflict. You will come out of the river tremendously refreshed.

There is no possibility of your being destroyed by the wind. You have to learn how to bow down, how to go with the wind; in whatsoever direction it wants, you bend. You should not choose ‘I will bend only to the north or to the south.’ It has to be with the wind. Let the wind decide; you simply remain available, vulnerable, and nothing can destroy you.

This is the art of being feminine. This is action through inaction, and that’s how my sannyasins have to be. Then nothing can defeat you, because you don’t want to be victorious in the first place. How can anybody defeat you if you don’t want to be victorious? You will be so enriched by each experience of surrender that you will be surprised how much one can get out of surrender. Infinite is the blessing of surrender. We unnecessarily go on fighting. So don’t fight, and if you don’t fight, you are the winner. But there is no desire to win; victory comes as a consequence of surrender.

Everything will go on enriching you; no need to be worried. Always trust existence and always trust that deep down it is beneficial, that it is not our enemy, that it is very caring, that it respects you.

How can it be against you? – you are part of it. The whole cannot be against the part. How can you be against your hand? How can you be against your nose? These are your parts! And even if sometimes the hand thinks you are against it, the hand is wrong. It may be that you are trying to take pus out of the hand. It hurts, and if the hand has any consciousness it must have decided that you are an enemy: You are hurting me! But still you are not an enemy; you are simply trying to help. It is your hand, how can you be inimical to it? You are simply trying to heal the wound, to help the wound to be healed; you are trying to take the poison out. But it hurts and the hand cannot understand the whole, the hand cannot comprehend the whole – that is the thing.

Man is a small part of this great existence, and man cannot comprehend the destiny of the whole. So sometimes when it hurts you think ‘It is against me.’ Nothing is ever against you! This is trust: that nothing is against you, nothing can be. ‘I come out of this existence and one day I will disappear back into it, so I am just a wave of the same ocean, I am not separate.’ Understanding this, great insight arises and you are relaxed.

Then, even death is not your enemy. Then, again existence is trying to help you. The body has become old, the body has become tired: now you need a new body; existence is just trying to take

the old garments away. But you are afraid, frightened, you think you are being killed. You are not being killed! If you remain in this old, rotten body then you will be killed! Existence is trying to give you a new life, a new beginning. So death is nothing but an effort from the side of existence to give you a new birth. It is our short-sightedness that makes us feel frightened. Once you trust, all fear disappears and the whole energy of fear is transformed into the energy of love. Just continue to meditate and I will be there with you!

[A sannyasin said she had enjoyed two groups but not the encounter because she felt condemned for not bringing up hatred. She said in another group she had felt murderous and fearful of it, but in the encounter she was not feeling hate.]

There is nothing to be worried about. In fact, everybody has a murderer in him. It is not something that you have. In fact every man, every woman, is the whole humanity in a miniature form. Whatsoever can be done by any man can be done by you; it is potentially there. You can commit a murder, you can commit suicide; you can become a sinner, you can become a saint. You can become Adolf Hitler and you can become a Buddha: the whole spectrum, each individual has the whole spectrum.

So never be worried, these are not problems; this is just the spectrum that is available to you. It is like you have a radio, all the stations are available. You have to tune in to whichsoever station you want and then you start functioning on that wavelength. Anger is there, hate is there, love is there; all wavelengths are available. Now it depends on you what you want to be. If you tune yourself into love, love will become available and all else it will recede into the background. It will always remain there; whenever you want to change the wavelength you can.

This is something very important to understand: even a Buddha, if he wants to be angry can immediately tune himself into the anger. It has not died, it is just lying dormant there; it is still available. He will not use it – that is another matter – but if he wants to use it, it is not that it is not available; it is there.

Your potential always remains there. If you don’t use it, it remains dormant; if you use it, it becomes more manifest. The difference between a Buddha and you is not that you have anger and he has no anger. The only difference is that he chooses his anger and you are chosen by your anger. Your anger becomes your master; he is master of his own self. Anger cannot possess him, unless he decides so, but the decision is always his. That is the only difference.

So don’t be worried about that. And sometimes it happens: when you want to bring something out it becomes more difficult, and when everybody is saying ‘Come on! Come out!’ one becomes more shrunken.

I think softer groups will bring you more to your reality. So next time you come, remind me in the beginning softer groups. Maybe Encounter was too hard. Kyo was better because Kyo is a softer phenomenon. So next time I will give you softer groups and they will bring up all that is hidden.

Sometimes a persuasion is needed, sometimes one has to be forced, and it is so difficult because each individual is so unique. Now, when I send you to the Encounter, Encounter has a certain structure. They cannot be persuasive, that is not part of their structure. They provoke, they don’t persuade, and maybe that was not right for you, that’s all.

[A sannyasin is leaving and Osho checks her energy.]

I am happy: your time here has been well spent. You have remained available to me, and you have drunk me as much as you could. But this is just a beginning! The basic contact has happened, so now even if you are thousands of miles away it can’t be lost it will remain there. You will be able to feel me as much as you are feeling here. And that is the most important thing: the contact. You are plugged in with me; that is the meaning of sannyas.

Now all that I have is available to you, it will depend on you how much you can take in; the doors are open. So go on drinking even when you are far away. Don’t let the distance create the idea that I am far away: I am not! Once you are open to me, I am not far away, I am very close by. Physical space disappears as love grows. And you have taken the first plunge into it; much more will be happening there. But come back, as soon as it is possible, come back. And help my people.

[Another sannyasin who is leaving says: I’m disappointed not to feel very much in contact with you when... I don’t feel your presence very much and I am a little sad.]

Everybody feels according to his own need, preparation, availability; there is no need to Compare. Never compare with others, otherwise you will become unnecessarily miserable.

The ways of comparison are always wrong. You are yourself and you have to grow from where you are. How can you feel me the way somebody else is feeling? He has lived totally differently, he has lived in different lives differently, he has followed a different path, his whole past is totally his; nothing is similar to you.

Even if you come to the same experience, still your experiences will be different. It is like four persons moving to the hilltop from four sides: one from the east, one from the west, one from the south, one from the north. When they come to the peak, they come to the same peak, but still their experience of the peak will be different because they have followed different paths.

Somebody has been following a very rocky path.Those rocky territories that he has travelled, that

arduous journey, they have made him a certain way, that journey has created his mind. When he comes to the top he will look through that mind. The other may have followed a smoother path which moved through beautiful valleys and flowers and trees and was not rocky at all, and the journey was a joy. The peak will be the same but the experience will be different and the expression will be different. So when you come to me, you come to me, and you have a whole history; almost the whole past, eternal, is contained by you. It is a totally different and unique past, it is like nobody else’s.

You will feel me in your own way, and you will feel me the way you need me; more or less will not be good. And it never happens in any other way; it always happens the way it should happen. So whatsoever is your need and whatsoever you deserve, you will get. For more one should not ask, otherwise one becomes unnecessarily miserable. And more cannot be given to you. For that you will have to move through a few experiences. And it may not be needed at all; that too has to be understood.

One tree needs more water, another tree doesn’t need that much water, and if you give that much water to the other tree, it will die. You will kill it by giving too much water. One tree needs more sun, another tree does not need that much sun; it needs shade. So everybody’s needs are different.

This is a constant problem, because thousands of sannyasins are here. Everybody’s needs are different and I pay individual attention to you. When I am talking to you I am simply talking to you; the whole world disappears for me, only you are there! And when I look into you I only look into you; there is no comparison with anybody.

Whatsoever your need, it will be fulfilled; that is a promise! But you should not start looking to others and their needs and their experiences and how they are feeling and what they are feeling, otherwise you will unnecessarily go mad, because there are so many people and with so many backgrounds. There are people who have lived through the heart; they will become very emotional when they come to me. There are people who have lived through the head; they will not be emotional, they will be very rational.

Nothing is wrong and nothing is good; whatsoever is yours is yours, and I have to contact you from there. I have to work on you from there. For those who function as reason, my impact is going to be different compared to those who function from emotion.

And if the emotional person starts thinking about you, he will also become miserable, because he may start thinking ‘Am I gullible or something? Why can’t I be more on my own? Why can’t I be more detached? Why am I so influenced?’ He can compare that way; there are people who compare that way, then they become miserable.

Comparison always brings misery. Drop comparing. Your needs will be fulfilled; there is no question about it. But I cannot fulfil others’ needs in you, that is impossible!

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