15

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‌CHAPTER 15

15 June 1978 pm in Chuang Tzu Auditorium

Prem means love, veenu is a musical instrument – a musical instrument of love. And man is a musical instrument. If we allow god, he can create much music in us. But we don’t allow it; we resist, we fight. Hence our life remains musicless, and that is the misery. Unless great music is born in the heart one cannot feel any significance, any splendour in life. And once the heart starts singing, once it is in the hands of god and he starts playing on the heart, life is a celebration. Then only life is.

Prem means love, madhu means drunkenness, intoxication, madness. Love is the greatest intoxicant there is. All other intoxicants are poor substitutes for it in fact other intoxicants are needed because love is missing. If love starts flowing, then there is no need for any intoxicant. It is the ultimate intoxicant. And it is in-built; you need not take it from the outside. It is your own wine that arises out of your own being; it is your own fragrance.

Become drunk with love! Become mad through love, because that is true sanity. The others who think they are sane are not sane. The sanity that comes from the mind is not real sanity; it is pretension. And just a little deeper than it, all kinds of insanities are boiling up. The sanity – the so-called sanity of the mind – is only a superficial facade. It is a screen behind which we are hiding all kinds of insanities, neuroses, psychoses.

There is a madness of love in which all other madnesses disappear, but it is not of the head, it is of the heart. It is not of the part, it is of the whole. It is organic: every cell of your body, every fibre of your being, participates in it. It is an orchestra.

The head is a single note, hence it is boring. And the head is always creating conflict inside because it wants to dominate. The head is a politician; it is on a power trip. The body is very innocent but the head condemns it, because only through condemnation can it control the body, repress the body.

The heart is non-competitive, humble. The head goes on beating it. Slowly slowly it represses the heart and the body so much... then the gap arises. The gap is so big that you become alienated from yourself. Your roots are in the body and your real being lives in the heart. The head is an imposter, but very clever and cunning.

When I say ‘become mad’, I mean become an inner unity again; let your being function as a single unit in which nobody dictates. Let there be a democracy, an inner democracy, and no dictator. The head immediately disappears then, because it can exist only as a dictator; it can’t exist in a democratic function. So the head will say that this is mad; the sanity will be condemned by the head as insane. But in fact when your whole starts functioning as an organic unity and you are an orchestra not lopsided, balanced – then only does real sanity arise, real wholeness and health.

Love is the alchemy to arrive at real sanity, but those who want real sanity have to risk their so-called sanity.

[To another sannyasin Osho says:]

And from this moment feel that way, think that way – that god is looking after you, that he loves you, that he protects, that he is surrounding you, that he mothers. Slowly slowly that feeling becomes more and more clear. We have forgotten it. It is still there; it has to be revived, it has to be supported. And once that feeling starts surrounding you, you live in a transformed world. Your energy starts going through a metamorphosis.

The very idea that god looks after you is such a relaxation. Then there is no fear, there is no death. Then one need not worry about the future. There is no need for planning and no hankering for security – one is already secure. Once the anxiety disappears and one starts moving in trust, miracles start happening. Things that you always wanted to happen to you and which were never happening, suddenly, out of nowhere, pop up. One is surprised every moment. Life becomes such a discovery of joy and such an adventure. But it is all possible only through trust.

And trust needs a certain soil, a certain climate – that climate you have to create around you. The seed is there; once you create the climate, the seed starts sprouting. That’s what the old religions used to call faith. That word has become degraded, used too much – every word becomes useless – but the underlying idea is of immense importance.

Faith means: ‘I am not alone – god is always with me.’ Faith means: ‘I cannot go wrong. Even if I try, I cannot go wrong, because he looks after me.’ In fact he looks after the person more who is going astray. Mm? that is the meaning of Jesus’ parable of the lost sheep and the shepherd who goes and searches for the lost sheep. And when he finds him he is immensely happy and he carries the sheep on his shoulders.

Jesus says ‘Such is the kingdom of god.’ Again and again he has been asked ‘What is this that you call kingdom of god, what exactly is it?’ But he never replies directly. He always says ‘Like the lost sheep and the shepherd... Like the mustard seed.’ He never says anything directly about what it is, he never defines, but he immediately responds with a parable: ‘The kingdom of god is like this...’

Just create that climate around you, and this world, the so-called world, is no more there then; a totally different kind of world arises. Everything remains the same but transfigured, transformed.

Everything remains the same but the meaning is different. Now it is full of god, it is godful. And when god vibrates everywhere, how can one live in misery? – it is impossible. How can one live in pain? – it is impossible. Even if it happens sometimes, that is nothing but an accident.

It need not be taken into account, it can be record – but joy becomes the main current.

This is what I call prayer. Words are not needed in prayer; just the pulsation of the heart is enough. Sometimes tears may come, one may sob. One may feel very very melting, liquid, flowing; one may feel utterly annihilated. And there will be a few moments when one will see that one is not, and those are the real moments of prayer – when one is not. That means that for a moment the ego has disappeared. And the ego is the barrier between you and god. When it is not, the window is open, and you can have a glimpse of the open sky.

The prayer is growing in you. And in these four weeks you will find it continuously happening.

Don’t repress it, because it looks a little embarrassing, mm? Suddenly one starts crying, feels like crying; one cannot say anything, one cannot communicate, and tears come. One feels very vulnerable, mm? one wants to control oneself. One wants not to show one’s emotions. What will people think? They will think you are so sentimental.

You have to allow it. This place is meant for all this. If you repress, you miss. Simply allow it. When crying comes, it is beautiful; when tears come, they are immensely valuable, they are the pearls of the heart. And enjoy! Rather than withdrawing from them, rather than trying to hold them, enjoy. Go with them whole-heartedly. Crying, become crying. Be so totally in tune with it that you are not separate, that you are not there like a judge – thinking, judging, condemning. You are not there at all; the act is all. And you will know the first taste of prayer. That is going to be your path.

You need not worry about meditation – prayer will do. And even if you do meditation, only prayer will happen. Whatsoever you do, prayer will happen. That is your natural, inborn capacity. That’s why, since you have come here, you have been crying and feeling so vulnerable and open. And naturally one starts feeling ‘What is happening? Am I going crazy or something?’ Prayer is happening, but prayer is crazy!

The world has forgotten the language of prayer, because the world is no more courageous enough to be crazy. Jesus was crazy. Anywhere in the street, in the marketplace, he would kneel down and start crying to the sky:‘Thy kingdom come, thy will be done.’ There would be great tears and he would forget the whole world. He would be no more there. He was with his ‘Abba’ – that was his word for father; it is closer than the word father. Father looks a little institutional; ‘Abba’ is closer. His disciples would ask many times ‘What is prayer?’ He would immediately kneel down and would start crying. He would be full of tears and full of joy, and something of the beyond would enter into him. Whenever he would find that he was tired of the world, the prayer because the prayer immediately takes you into another plane of being.

So in these four weeks go deeper and deeper into prayer, and allow all kinds of emotions to surface. You have been carrying them for your whole life and you have not allowed them. Now the time has come. And that is the purpose of meeting me, of coming here. If I can give you prayer, then you have received the gift – the gift of all gifts – which will take you on the farthest journey and will help

you. It will help you in life, it will help you in death. It will help you here, it will help you there – this world and the other world – because prayer is the bridge, the rainbow bridge between the two worlds, between this and that, matter and mind, creation and the creator.

And this is the meaning of your name. Punita means pure, holy... and that purity, that holiness, comes of its own accord if the heart becomes full of prayer. So dance, sing, be with my mad people. Love them and be loved by them! This is a love world, my world. And love, to me, is the temple: if one can enter into love, one is bound to find god.

So just enjoy in these few days you will be here; and next time come for a longer period, or think to come forever. Something you would like to say to me now? (she shakes her head) Good!

[A sannyasin says: I’m feeling a bit more inward these days and meditations are feeling good to me.]

One has to go inward. And you have roamed outward long enough – it is time to go inward! Have the taste of the inner now. And once you have tasted the inner then there is nothing in the outer. Once you have seen the inner beauty, the outer simply pales, is reduced to nothing; it is only a reflection. If you have seen the real moon, who bothers about the moon reflected in a mirror? The outer world is just a reflection of the inner.

That’s very good. Go, go whole-heartedly. The mind may create trouble. The mind will say ‘What is happening? What are you doing? This way you will be isolated, you will become alone, you will be cut off from people.’ The mind will find so many excuses to go out – don’t listen. You are not being cut off from people; you are only getting joined together with yourself. And when one is oneself, when one is joined with oneself, then only can one be with others; there is no other way. If you are not yourself, if you have not known what your inner reality is, all your relationships are just bogus, just games to keep you occupied... of no value. The real relationship arises only when you are, when you are rooted, centred, in your being. Then you can spread your hands, then you can embrace somebody and you can love. And that love will have a totally different flavour – the flavour of freedom.

So don’t be distracted by the mind. The mind is the devil in the old scriptures, mm? You read that Jesus is tempted by the devil. That devil is nobody else but the mind, the old name for the mind, a mythological name for the mind. It always tempts, it always says ‘Go out – do this, be that. Don’t waste your time sitting and gazing at your navel.’ Inwardness is not an accepted value in the world of the mind because they are polar opposites. If you become inward, the mind has to die. The mind can exist only if you remain without and never come within. So beware! The devil will tempt you. And the devil is not somewhere else; it is just your mind.

If one is alert, slowly slowly one understands that there is no need to be distracted by the mind. And once you have entered into your being, there is no fear; then the mind cannot do anything. Then the mind becomes a beautiful servant. The mind is a beautiful servant but a very ugly master. So allow it.

[A sannyasin has asked about his negativity.]

Remember one thing: when the negative moments come, just remain watchful; don’t get identified with them. They come, and they come with a great force... and when they are coming with great

force it is an indication that soon they will die. Before they die, they come with great force; it is their last effort to catch hold of you.

It is just as the night becomes very dark just before it is going to end, just before the dawn is going to happen.Or just as a dying man becomes very alive in the last moments. For months or years

he may have been ill and weak but in the moment of death, for a few moments before, he becomes bright, alert, alive, as if all disease has disappeared. It is the last effort, the last bout of life energy, the last effort to catch hold, mm?

That’s what is happening to you. Your negative moods will become deeper and deeper; now you have to be very very alert not to get distracted by them. Let them come – watch. A cloud comes and goes; you are the witness. Don’t repress, and don’t be dragged down by it; don’t be overpowered by it eitherand soon it will disappear.

[A sannyasin says: When I first came to you I wanted to dance and sing, but now I feel to sit and be quiet. What is my path of meditation?]

Both are good and both have to be enjoyed – there is no need to get fixated. The best way for you will be to remain mobile and dynamic: when you feel like dancing, dance, and when you feel like sitting silently, sit. No need to force anything. If you choose, then there will be enforcement. If you choose dancing and there are moments when you want to sit silently, then either you start feeling guilty that you are doing something wrong or you force dance. But a forced dance is not a true dance. It won’t give you any joy, it will be tiring. Or if you choose dancing and there are moments which are not for danceor you have chosen silence, and the desire to dance arises, it is better not

to choose. For you it will be better not to choose.

Simply remain mobile. Whatsoever happens, let it happen in the moment and let the moment decide. Dance is good, so is silence. And a man is richer if he can move in both naturally, because then he has more dimensions to his being. There are moments you can contact Krishna through your dance and there are moments you can contact Buddha through your silence.

No need to choose. Remain choicelessly alert. Whatsoever comes, let it happen.

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