Chapter title: None

‌Chapter title: None‌

3 November 1980 pm in Chuang Tzu Auditorium

Archive code: 8011035 ShortTitle: ALLWAY03 Audio:

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[NOTE: This is an unedited tape transcript of an unpublished darshan diary, which has been scanned and cleaned up. It is for reference purposes only.]

THE ONLY VICTORY: THE INNER INNINGS

The victory over others is bound to be ugly.

To reduce somebody to a slave cannot be beautiful, to possess somebody like a thing is the most inhuman act possible. But as far as the inner victory is concerned it is a totally different matter. Then it is a war between light and dark, between the conscious and the unconscious, and one is trying to conquer the darker part or one's being. Nobody is reduced to a slave, in fact the darker part is released from imprisonment.

When one becomes absolutely conscious of oneself one has entered into the most beautiful space. There is no slave but there is mastery, nothing is possessed but one is a conqueror. In fact even one's own self disappears in that ultimate victory.

To say it exactly will look like a paradox but this is the only way to say it: the ultimate victory is when you are not, when the ego disappears, only then has one arrived home.

SLEEPY I'S

Meditation is not concentration. That is the first thing to understand and the misunderstanding is worldwide. There are thousands of books written about meditation which say that it means concentration.

Meditation is just the opposite of concentration.

Concentration is a state when you are focussing your mind upon an object, meditation is a state of no-mind. Concentration includes only one object and excludes everything else. Meditation is just silence --

inclusive of all, excluding nothing. You are simply available to existence and that availability creates the ultimate peak of consciousness. The West has called it Christ consciousness and the East has called it 1/08/07

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Buddha consciousness. Only the names are different; it is the same phenomenon.

And that is the meaning of Christina: Christ consciousness. You must have been told that it means Christian -- it doesn't. Even though all the dictionaries say it does, I say to you it does not mean Christian. If it means Christian then there are millions of Christians in the world and nobody seems to have any experience of Christ consciousness.

Friedrich Nietzsche has said that the first and the last Christian died on the cross twenty centuries ago --

and he is right. Christ was the first and the last Christian in the sense that he attained Christ consciousness.

Others have been just imitators, followers.

When one can become a Christ why should one be a follower? My sannyasins are not my followers.

They are just friends, fellow travelers, lovers, but not followers. There is no qualitative difference between me and my sannyasins. The only difference is that unfortunately I am awake and they are fast asleep. But that is my problem, not theirs!

MEDITATION: MENDING THE BUCKET THEN KICKING IT

(Leonardo learns how we dissipate energy and about a dying that can happen before the death of the body.)

Man can live in two ways and he can live both ways simultaneously. One can live with people and one can live with oneself -- there is no antagonism, there is no dichotomy. The door from which you come out is the same door from which you enter. It is the same door, on one side the doors says entrance, on the other side the same door says exit. They are not two doors. Man's consciousness has these two powers: to relate or to be alone -- and both are good.

The way to relate is love and the way to be alone is meditation.

Leonardo means strong as the lion. The lion metaphorically represent, a few things: first, courage, second, fearlessness, and third, strength. And all these three are needed for the meditator. One has to be courageous to be alone. The most courageous act in life is to experience absolute aloneness. We cling to each other just in order to avoid our aloneness. But one cannot succeed because it is our intrinsic nature --

how can you avoid it? how can you escape from it? Wherever you go it will be there with you; even in the crowd you are alone. It is your very nature; hence it is better to understand it, to love it, to live it, to discover its treasures rather than escaping from it.

All our occupations, all our so-called love affairs, the family, the children, the business, the world of all desires and ambitions, are basically nothing but an escape. One does not want to encounter one's aloneness.

It creates great fear. It is like a bottomless abyss -- one wants to cling to anything, even to a straw.

The drowning man thinks that it is going to save him. When he is in his senses he will understand. How can a straw help him? But he consoles himself. People

are clinging to straws and life is slipping out of their hands, they are drowning.

Every moment you are going deeper and deeper into the water and soon death will take over. Before death takes over, the most important thing is to experience your aloneness, because the person who knows his aloneness becomes immortal, death cannot destroy him. Knowing his aloneness he has already lived his death -

- now what can death do to him? He has experienced it.

Meditation is the experiences the conscious, deliberate experience of death. And the person who can experience death consciously suddenly becomes aware that death has happened but his consciousness is still there; he is absolutely alone, the whole world has disappeared, but he is still there.

And when one knows this crystal clear consciousness there is a self-evident certainty that even death will not be able to touch it. The body will be taken, the mind will be taken, the heart will be taken, everything will disappear but your innermost core, your real essence will survive -- and that's what you are.

Hence the fear of death disappears. But only a meditator can go beyond the fear, can go beyond death.

So to experience meditation these three qualities are needed. One has to be courageous -- it is facing death. Courage can be defined as encountering death deliberately, knowingly risking.

Secondly, a certain fearlessness is needed. The fearful people always cling to things, to money, to power, to people, to family, tradition, church -- anything will do but they cling. And they go on inventing new ways to cling. Sometimes there are very stupid kinds of things to cling to, but the function is the same.

Somebody goes on collecting postal stamps and he clings to them; that is his treasure. Now, it seems to be 1/08/07

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so foolish but it keeps his mind occupied. As if life is not enough, people invent

the Rotary Club, the Lions Club, and a thousand and one clubs, and they rush from one club to another club, from one restaurant to another restaurant and they go on inventing games, playing cards and chess. If you ask them 'What are you doing?' they say 'We are killing time.' Now this is just absurd. Time is killing you! Who are you befooling that you are killing time? Who has ever heard of anybody being able to kill time? Time kills everybody.

It is said of Diogenes that one day Alexander came to see him and he was very much puzzled. Diogenes was sitting there in a cemetery. He had a pile of bones and he was searching for something. Alexander asked

'What are you doing?' He said 'I am looking for the royal bones of your ancestor'. Alexander said 'You are just mad. You always do something mad. Now bones are bones -- you cannot make any distinction between the bones of a beggar and a king.'

Diogenes said 'Then you are not so stupid as I used to think. If bones are not different then nothing is different. Then why do you go on befooling yourself that you are a king? Death will reduce everything to equality; nobody will be a king and nobody will be a beggar. Before that happens don't waste this opportunity. Look in and find something that goes beyond the body, that which goes beyond the bone, and the blood and the marrow.'

Meditation needs courage, it needs fearlessness and it also need strength. In fact everybody is born with a great strength but our lives are such that we have a thousand holes and the strength goes on leaking out.

We are like a bucket with many holes and you put the bucket in the well: when it is under the water it is full of water and as you start pulling it out all the water starts flowing. By the time it reaches your hands it is empty. The meditator has to close all these holes, he has to preserve energy, he has to live a life very consciously so that nothing is wasted.

And if you watch you will be surprised; almost ninety per cent of your work is sheer wastage, you could have avoided it. And if you can drop the unnecessary ninety per cent then the ten per cent which is necessary is not a wastage. It nourishes you, it makes you stronger, it gives you power, some integrity, some centering.

A sannyasins life has to be a continuous elimination of the non-essential so only

the essential is left, then meditation is very simple. It is as simple as breathing, but one has to fulfil these throe conditions.

WAKING BEAUTY

(It takes the kiss of bliss.)

Any other kind of beauty is superficial, it has no depth. It is just a facade. One can cover up one's ugliness but the covered-up ugliness is still there, not only there but it is continuously growing, spreading like cancer.

The sannyasin has to search for the real source of beauty. The real source of beauty is the explosion that happens when you reach the centre of your being. The moment you touch that centre, suddenly there is an explosion of joy. Every cell of your being starts dancing, every fibre of your existence starts vibrating in an unknown, mysterious melody. And then there is beauty.

That beauty has depth, that beauty has something divine in it. It cannot be taken away, it cannot be destroyed because it is not something painted on from the outside, it has grown from within. Such a person is beautiful even in his death. Even in his death there is a smile, even in his death you can see that though the soul has left the body there are still footprint, of something immensely beautiful.

When P.D. Ouspensky, one of the disciples of George Gurdjieff, was dying the doctors insisted that he lie down and rest because time was short, he would not survive more than twelve hours. But he would not rest -- he went for a long walk. His disciples and friends followed him and they asked 'What are you doing?

He said 'I want to die fully conscious.' And then for the whole night he walked up and down the corridor.

All his friends and disciples remained awake watching him and they were surprised by one thing, that as death started coming closer he started looking more and more beautiful, more and more graceful. When everybody who had loved him and was present felt that it was a tremendously beautiful moment. They had never known Ouspensky in such a beautiful space ever.

The blissful person lives beautifully, dies beautifully. And if one can manage these two things, to live beautifully and to die beautifully, one has managed

everything. Then one has arrived at the ultimate destination.

In the East we have given god three names satyam, shivam, sundaram. Satyam means the ultimate truth, 1/08/07

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shivam means the ultimate good and sundaram means the ultimate beauty. But remember, sundaram, the last name, is the highest.

LOVE'S VIEW: LOVE OR YOU

(Prem Juni means love, and, a small white flower, a certain kind of Eastern flower, Osho tells a sannyasin, which has a very beautiful fragrance.)

Love also is a flower, a small flower. Love is also white, white in the sense that it contains all the colours. If you mix all the colours the ultimate result is white. White is not a colour, it is the synthesis of all the colours. It is just as black is not a colour either; it is the absence of all colours. And white is the presence of all colours. They are two extremes, and between black and white are the seven colours. When all the colours are absent, it is black; when all the colours are present then it is white. Love is a multi-dimensional phenomenon, it is white. And white also represents innocence, purity, cleanliness, an empty book in which nothing is written yet.

Sufis have a book, they call it THE BOOK OF THE BOOKS. It is absolutely empty, nothing is written on it. It has existed for at least one thousand years and it is given by the master to the disciple; it has been delivered hand to hand. In these last thousand years no book has been read so meditatively as this, The Book of the Books. People read it, they meditate on each page. And the miracle is that as you go on reading it, more and more meanings are revealed.

If you just look at a blank paper you will be surprised that your mind starts projecting itself onto it. You start reading things which are not there, your mind projects them. And the book is complete only, one has studied it completely only, when one comes to the point when there is no projection, when you are

there, fully conscious and the empty page is there and there is no projection. That day the book can be closed; one has understood the message. One has become utterly empty, white. Hence white is also the colour of absolute emptiness.

And love needs emptiness. The person who is full of ego cannot love; the person who is utterly egoless has the capacity to move into deep love.

BELIEVE YOU DIE AND YOU ACCEPT A LIE

(Amrit Sadhana means the search for the deathless.)

One of the most beautiful and the profoundest prayers is found in the Upanishads. It is the smallest prayer ever uttered yet it contains all the scriptures. The prayer is: Asto ma sadgamay -- lead me, lord, from the world of untruth to the world of truth. Tumso ma jyotirgamay -- lead me, lord, from the world of darkness to the world of light. Mrityorma amritamgamay -- lead me, lord, from the world of death to the world of the deathless. This is the whole prayer, just three sentences. Translated exactly it simply means from untruth to truth, from darkness to light, from death to deathlessness -- and this is the whole enquiry of a sannyasin. It is a three-dimensional enquiry.

We have to drop all that is untrue. The moment we drop the untrue the truth is revealed of its own accord. You need not go anywhere in search of it, it is found within. The moment we become aware of our inner darkness that very awareness creates light. Awareness is light and when the light is there darkness starts disappearing. And the moment there is truth and there is light suddenly one becomes absolutely certain of one's immortality. There is no way to die. Death is the greatest illusion. Nobody has ever died, people just believe that they die. It is a belief, it has no relationship to the truth.

Those who know, know that life is eternal, always ongoing; there is no end to it -

- no beginning, no end.

It has always been here, it will always be here.

One of the great sages of India, Maharishi Ramana, was dying, and a disciple asked him, 'Bhagwan, after your death where will you go to?' And even at the moment of death -- he was suffering very much physically because he had a cancer of the throat; even speaking was difficult, even drinking water was

impossible -- he burst out laughing. The doctors could not believe it, because to laugh like this was almost impossible, his throat was completely choked, not even a single drop of water was entering. But he laughed 1/08/07

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and it was a belly laughter and for many days he had not even spoken. But at the last moment to this enquiry he said 'For my whole life I have been teaching you but you don't listen. You are still a fool. You are asking me where I am going? I have never gone anywhere, I have always been here and I will always be here --

because there is only one time, and that is now, here. There is no other space and no other time. Now and here -- these two words contain the whole existence.'

Begin by dropping all that is untrue, all that you have believed but you have not known -- that is untrue.

Drop it. And become aware of your inner unconsciousness so that awareness starts dispelling the darkness.

And then the third happens on its own: one suddenly enters into a new dimension, one goes beyond time.

And to go beyond time is to go beyond death. To know that life is eternal is the beginning of rejoicing.

EMPTINESS IS AM-TINESS

(Bliss is never partial, Osho begins this address.)

It is never imperfect, because it cannot be divided into parts. Either it is or it is not but you cannot have a little bit of it, less or more of it. The word 'quantity' is irrelevant to bliss When it happens it is always perfect, it is always total, it is always whole.

So it cannot happen gradually, you cannot go on achieving it little by little, step

by step. It is a jump, a quantum leap from misery to bliss, from darkness to light, from death to life -- just a jump. It is not a journey, remember, it is a jump, a sudden jump. The whole preparation is for the jump. The whole journey is not from misery to bliss, the whole journey is to prepare yourself so that you can take the jump, but the jump happens suddenly and totally. It does not happen in time, not even in a split second, it is non-temporal.

Hence the person who is meditating is waiting for the ultimate surprise. It is unpredictable -- when it is going to happen nobody knows, nobody can say. One thing is certain, that if you are ready... and readiness means if you are empty -- no thought, no desire, no imagination, no memory, no mind as such -- when you have put the whole mind aside. It is going to happen -- that much is certain -- but when, nobody can say.

Whenever your emptiness is total, immediately the whole sky descends in you, you are transformed.

One becomes a Christ or a Buddha and then life really begins. Before that we are in the womb. That is the moment when one really comes out of the psychological womb. For the first time we see what existence really is -- and that experience is the experience of god.

Going All the Way

Chapter #4

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