Chapter title: None

‌Chapter title: None‌

21 November 1980 pm in Chuang Tzu Auditorium

Archive code: 8011215 ShortTitle: ALLWAY21 Audio:

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[NOTE: This is an unedited tape transcript of an unpublished darshan diary, which has been scanned and cleaned up. It is for reference purposes only.]

BLISS IS A SPENDTHRIFT

(It's life is in its being shared, Osho tells Anand Angelo. To begin he explains the first meaning of Angelo: a bringer of truth.)

The state of bliss is a passage for god to enter into the world. Misery is like a cloud. The sun cannot penetrate the cloud although it is there, but when the sky is clouded you don't get the light.

Truth is always there, but our minds are full of clouds, dark clouds of misery, sadness, seriousness. That prevents us, that becomes a barrier between us and the truth. Once these clouds are dispersed the sun starts shining forth; you are bathed in it. And it is not only that you are transformed through it, you start delivering the message through your actions, gestures, words, silence.

Hence the other meaning of Angelo: the messenger of god. The blissful person is a messenger of god.

That is inevitable. When you are blissful you are bound to share it. When you have the truth you cannot be miserly about it, because the mathematics of truth is

that the more you give it, the more you have it, the less you give, the less you have. If you stop sharing, it dies. Sharing is its very breath, its very heartbeat.

TRUTH -- LESS A THEORY, MORE A FLAVOUR

(Osho is talking to Satya Antonella; she is from Italy.) Satya means the truth -- not a theory about the truth but truth itself, the experience of it, the immediate communion with it, not going round and round in thinking. Thinking is always about and about; it goes on in circles.

Truth never comes through thinking -- that is not its way. When thinking stops, it is there. And truth is not an experience like other experiences, either. When you experience something it remains separate from you; when you experience truth you are it. The experiencer and the experienced are not two, the knower and 1/08/07

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the known are not two. The seer and the seen become one, the observed and the observer are exactly the same.

And Antonella means priceless. This experience of truth cannot be given by anybody to you, neither purchased or sold. It is not a commodity, it is not available in the market. One has to deserve it, one has to be worthy of it; one has to be absolutely receptive.

That's the whole function of sannyas -- to make you ready, worthy, deserving, receptive, open, so when the truth knocks at your door you are able to recognise the guest. Sannyas means preparing you as a host for the ultimate guest. And whenever the host is ready, the guest immediately appears, as if he were always waiting just for your readiness.

How long will you be here?

(Her reply is so soft-spoken as to render it almost inaudible but her body slumps to one side as she waves an arm about, and Osho has understood.)

Be here. That's the way Italians behave! Once they are here, they are here forever.

NOTHING TO LOSE BUT LOVELESSNESS

Love is not possible if one is arrogant, egoistic. Love is possible only if one puts the ego aside -- that's what makes one humble. Remember one thing: humbleness is not a state practised by the ego. The ego can practise humbleness, but then that humbleness is pseudo; hidden behind the facade of humbleness is ego.

One can even become proud of one's humbleness; then one has missed the target. It is impossible to be proud of one's humbleness -- that is a contradiction in terms. Either you are proud or you are humble, you can't be both together.

So humbleness does not mean less ego, it means simply no ego. And the moment ego is totally put aside, discarded, love starts blossoming as if the spring has come suddenly to you. And there is not only one flower but thousands of flowers in your being. And great is the fragrance.

It is because of this experience of the spring and the flowers and the infinite fragrance that Jesus called god love. He came closer to the definition of god than anybody else before him. 'God is love, simply means god is only for those who are ready to risk their ego totally. But one loses nothing in losing the ego except one's misery, darkness, one's death.

All that is wrong with us is with us only because of the ego. The ego is the only problem, and egolessness, the only solution.

PRAYER: NOT SAID, NOT SAD

Prayer is not serious at all. If it is serious it is not prayer; it is something pseudo pretending to be prayer.

Prayer is childlike innocence. Prayer is playfulness, cheerfulness joyousness. And when prayer is nothing but rejoicing, then there is no point in keeping a separate time for it or doing it in the church every Sunday or every morning and evening in the temple or five times a day, like Mohammedans. If cheerfulness is prayer, then one can be cheerful twenty-four hours a day. And one should be in communion with god for twenty-four hours a day; less than that won't do. It is

not possible to be prayerful for one hour, and for twenty-three hours just the opposite. But that's what the whole world is doing.

When you see people in the churches they are totally different people. When you meet the same people in their offices and in their shops unbelievable that these are the same people! How humble they were looking kneeling down in the church and praying to god, and now how aggressive, arrogant, egoistic, they are! And what they are for twenty -- three hours a day is their reality; that one hour is bogus, pretended.

But the whole of humanity is somehow living in deep hypocrisy. Not only are people deceiving each other, they are even trying to deceive god by creating a false prayer. What is one doing? - one is trying to cheat even god. And that is the ugliest thing even to imagine.

So I don't teach you to pray at a certain period every day before you go to sleep. It should not be a routine, it should be just your way of life. It should be something like breathing or like the heartbeat. It is not only that you breathe for one hour every Sunday in church and then drop it. Then there will be no more Sundays! You continue to breathe even your sleep.

And that's how prayer should be -- just a blissfulness. Then it is neither Christian nor Hindu nor 1/08/07

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Mohammedan, it is pure prayer.

NOT A COP-OUT BUT A DROP-OUT

(Sannyas is the disinheritance of one's past.)

Sannyas has to be a new birth, only then can it have any significance. Unless you discontinue with your past totally, irrevocably, you will not be able to really become a sannyasin. The past with all its rubbish and the garbage that others have loaded upon you, has simply to be discarded mercilessly.

The beginning of the inquiry into truth is possible only when you are absolutely free from all knowledge that others have given to you -- that's what I mean by discarding the past -- so one starts from ABC. One starts growing one's own. And the beauty of being one's own self is immense; it's inestimable, immeasurable. The greatest thing that can happen to a person is a new birth.

The first birth is bound to be ordinary because you will be dependent on the parents, and they have their vested interests. You will have to go to the college, to the university, and they have their vested interests.

You will have to listen to the priest and to the politician and all kinds of advisors, and they have their vested interests. It is a vast conspiracy against a small child, a helpless child, who cannot defend himself, who cannot even argue, who does not even know what is happening and why it is happening, who has come just like a clean slate. And people are writing all kinds of things on him. What they are writing he cannot read and they are writing without asking his permission. By the time he becomes capable of understanding what has been written on him, it has already gone too deep into his blood, into his bones, into his very marrow.

So the first birth is going to be a wastage. And I don't think that the day will ever come when we will be able to not destroy the child. It seems impossible. The parents cannot lose their grip; the society cannot lose its grip. They have to mould, shape, the child according to them, and of course they think they are doing it for the child's own good. And they sincerely believe it, they fanatically believe in what they are doing, because the same has been done to them by their parents, and so on and so forth.

God himself did the same with Adam and Eve. He started giving them ideas about what they should do and what they should not do. The first father -- and already the whole poisoning process has started. You should not eat from this tree. He would not allow them to have the freedom to taste all kinds of fruits and decide what is worth eating and what is not worth eating. He started manipulating, and since then every father has been doing the same.

So the only hope is the second birth; the first birth is bound to be hopeless. Sannyas is a second birth.

Now you can consciously, deliberately become a dropout of the whole established pattern. You can consciously withdraw yourself and you can start

afresh.

I don't give you any shoulds and should-nots. My work is basically negative. It is just to remove the conditioning that has been forced upon you. Once the conditioning is removed you are free to do whatsoever you want to do, to be yourself, authentically yourself. And the moment one is oneself, one starts growing, blossoming, flowering, flowing. Life starts taking on a new meaning, a splendour of its own.

HAPPINESS IS KEEPING PACE

(Lag behind life's dance and you are miserable, Osho says to Vardana.) Life is not a thing but a process; it is continuously growing -- but everybody stops somewhere. Life goes on growing, but you stop; you start lagging behind. And the gap between you and life is your misery. And the gap becomes bigger every day because life goes on, the river goes on, and you are stuck somewhere.

You have become obsessed with some place. You are no more part of the flowing river, you are clinging to some bank, and that clinging has become your security, your safety. You are now afraid to move with life.

The psychologists only became aware in the First World War that the average psychological age of human beings is somewhere between twelve and fourteen. The person may be eighty years old but his psychological age is only twelve. What does it mean? It means that somewhere near about twelve he stopped growing. The body went on but the mind stopped, so he behaves like a twelve- year-old child; psychologically he is juvenile, not even adult. And you can immediately see.… Just create a situation: insult him and he will go into a tantrum, and you will immediately see the childishness of what he is doing, of what he is saying. He himself repents later on; he himself feels very sad and sorry about what he has done, 1/08/07

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for the simple reason that he can see the foolishness of it and he sees that he has fallen from the age of eighty to the age of twelve. He tries to patch things up; he

goes and asks your forgiveness and says 'I did it in spite of myself' -- and all that nonsense. Now he is trying to come back somehow to his old pretension, to his old mask. But that mask is a mask; it is not your original face. The original face is hidden behind the mask.

What we are doing here is to help you see where you have stopped growing and to help you to move from there ... because to stop is to die. To become dormant is to become dead. To become stagnant simply means nothing else except that your life will stink And the whole world is stinking for the simple reason that people are pretending to be somebody who they are not, and whatsoever they are, they are repressing it.

But it comes up again and again; it surfaces again and again.

So there are two things to be done by the sannyasin: one: he should try to see where he has stopped growing -- all the meditations and the growth groups and all the work that is going on in this commune is to make you aware of where you are stuck -- and second, he should drop his clinging and start moving with the river. The moment you start flowing, great joy arises, the heart starts dancing. You are born anew. This is resurrection.

Life knows no end. Those who know how to grow, those who know how to keep in tune with existence and not lag behind, how not to rush ahead but just to be in tune, in step with life -- they go on growing even beyond death, because death is not the end. Life is an eternal procession -- beginningless, endless.

That is the meaning of your name, Vardana. Let it become your experience too. NOT ACCUMULATING BUT AWAKING

(Osho talks further on the difference between knowledge and knowing.) Knowledge can be accumulated without any awakening. It is a process which can go on happening even while you are asleep. It needs no awareness; it is a mechanical phenomenon. That's why now, particularly in Soviet Russia, they are trying to create methods of sleep-teaching. Hypnosis, sleep, has to be used as a teaching device, so the child is not to be left alone even when he is asleep. He is not to be allowed to dream his own dreams. Now society will manipulate even dreams; they can be manipulated. The child will be sleeping... now thousands of children in Russia are sleeping -- it is still an experiment, but they are succeeding in the experiment, and soon it will be applicable to everybody -- they

are sleeping with earphones on, and while they are asleep something goes on being repeated in their ears, whisper-like, so it does not disturb their sleep, and soon they become accustomed to it. And the strange thing is, their minds go on learning. In the morning you can ask them questions and they will answer them, and even they are surprised because they did not know those answers before. Because they were taught while they were asleep, they are not aware that they know the answers. But if you ask them the answer comes. Even the person is surprised as to where the answer is coming from ... because mind functions like a machine, like a computer.

So knowledge needs no awareness, but knowing is a totally different phenomenon. It needs awareness.

My concern is not knowledge but knowing. I am not interested in imparting information to you; my interest is in waking you up so that you can see with your own eyes what the case is. What is this immense universe? And what is this consciousness within you? The moment you become fully acquainted with these two things, the within and the without you have known both your aspects, the outer and the inner. And that knowing liberates, it liberates one from all bondage

-- then the night is over and the morning has come.

(In his address to Nagesh Osho expands more on the nature of knowing or wisdom. First he explains the meaning of Nagesh.)

Nagesh literally means the king of the serpents, but the serpent represents wisdom. In all the cultures of the world the serpent has always represented wisdom. Even Jesus says: "Be ye as wise as serpents."

There must be something in it, that the serpent has appealed to all the cultures, all the societies, Eastern and Western, and has given them some idea of it being wise. One thing is very special about the serpent, and that is, it has no ears but it can hear music. It can even dance to the tune of the music. And my feeling is that that phenomenon has triggered the idea of wisdom.

Only now have scientists been able to find what the reason is... because it was strange: snakes don't have anything comparable to ears, and when there are no ears and no eardrums, how can the music be heard? And 1/08/07

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it cannot be denied that it is heard. You can even see the snake and the serpent dancing, moving. The serpent-charmer simply plays on his instrument and the serpents start coming out of their hiding places, moving quickly towards the person. And they won't attack the person; they will surround him and dance with the tune.

Only recently has science been able to discover that the serpent does not hear from an ear, but his whole body is sensitive. There is no particular instrument for hearing, but his whole body functions as an ear. It is so sensitive, so receptive -- it is as if each cell of its body hears; the very vibe of the music pulsates his whole being.

And that's the quality of the wise man, that his whole being sees, hears, feels. He is no more confined to his senses, his seeing is not only of the eyes, he sees from his whole body. The moment he sees a sunset his whole body becomes just eyes. He feels the beauty of the sunset from every pore. When he listens to music, it is the same again: his whole being becomes sensitive -- turns into just a receptacle. He receives the music from each cell and fibre of his body, mind and soul. He is total -- that totality indicates wisdom.

So Nagesh metaphorically means total receptivity. And the moment you are totally receptive god is yours. God cannot be received partially, you have to be totally involved. You cannot hold yourself back; either you are in it or you are not in it. To be totally in the experience gives wisdom. Then whatsoever the experience... if you are in love, be total in love and don't hold back; if you are dancing then dance totally, don't hold back; if you are singing then sing totally, don't hold back. Each act has to be total, and then from each act immense wisdom will be derived. You will become a reservoir of wisdom. When one is full of wisdom, one is a Buddha or a Christ. These people are not knowledgeable people, but they know, they understand.

BABY, IT'S DARK INSIDE!

Man ordinarily lives in unconsciousness. His whole inner being is dark. There is no light, not even a candle-light. That's why people don't want to go in, even though all the Buddhas have been saying to go in, to know yourself, to discover

who you are, to ask who you are. People listen, but they don't even because they know that whenever they look inside there is only darkness and nothing else. Even a man like C.E.M.

Joad, a very famous Western philosopher, was intrigued again and again, because he was reading Socrates, Buddha, Zarathustra and Jesus, and they were all saying one thing insistently: Know thyself, look within.

And then he read a book of George Gurdjieff in which he talks about self- remembering: Remember yourself. Fortunately, he was ill and sick and taking rest in bed, and the doctors had said that for at least two months he could not leave the bed -- total rest. So with nothing to do he thought, 'Why not try? I am not going to lose anything, I am not doing anything else anyway, so lying down on the bed resting I can try to go within and see who I am.' He tried for a few minutes and then he wrote in his diary that it was useless, because there was only darkness and nothing else. And the man died, although he came very close to the key. Those two months would have become his most significant experience on earth. But he missed, and missed while just around the corner the door would have opened.

He needed somebody to remind him that when you look within and you see darkness, one thing is certain, that you are not darkness. You are the seer, and you are seeing darkness. Certainly one thing is certain that you are not the darkness, otherwise, how can you see? How can darkness see darkness? -- it is impossible. Just this much had to be told to the poor man and he might have tried again. But because he was just working on his own, just reading from the book, he tried it for a few minutes then dropped the idea and wrote about it in his diary -- and that was his last thing. Then he died after a few days. The diary was discovered later on.

It is this moment when a master is needed who can tell you the subtle difference. It was so simple; he would have immediately understood if somebody had indicated it. He was not a stupid person but very intellectual, intelligent, He would have followed the idea that if he could see darkness... not darkness, and that would have become a revelation. Then going on and on, deeper and deeper into darkness... just as every night has an end and the morning comes, every enquiry into one's darkness brings one to a point where the dawn That dawn is

symbolic -- awakening, enlightenment.

And life is only an opportunity. If one attains sambodhi, one has fulfilled one's life. If one misses it, then the opportunity is lost, a great opportunity is lost. And to be a sannyasin means now you are very close. The key is just right in front of you. It can be used. It can unlock the doors of your innermost chamber, and there 1/08/07

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god resides. At the innermost core of your being resides the most precious experience of your life, one which takes you beyond death, beyond time, into eternity.

So I am giving you one of the most important names possible. Always remember, it has to become an experience. And it can, it is everybody's birthright.

Going All the Way

Chapter #22

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